What do you Have to Prove?

Jan 12 2024 - Amy Raby

When it comes to salvation, grace was pounded into my head for years. Verses like Ephesians 2:8-9, “by grace you have been saved...not by works, so that no one can boast,” were some of my earliest scripture memories. Grace as the foundation for my salvation was reiterated by pastors and Sunday school teachers and youth leaders. The message was: you don’t deserve salvation…You could never be good enough to earn your way to heaven…It is completely dependent on the cross of Christ and His love to save you from your sins…Jesus did everything; I did nothing. 

I believed this…for my salvation. What wasn’t taught to me was the work of grace for sanctification——being transformed as a person who now follows Jesus. I don’t remember hearing how to receive and embrace the grace of God for my living breathing days. It was more like, once I was saved, grace became the need for the lost, not the continual gift for the follower of Jesus. I knew I couldn’t save myself, but because my theology of grace was restricted to eternal salvation, over time, I felt like I needed to prove myself. 

John 13:37 reminds me that I’m not alone in this.  

“Peter says, “I will lay down my life for you.” Jesus replied, “will you lay down your life for me?” 

Who is the one who was in need of a life laid down? Jesus or Peter? Who was sent to the world to walk alongside sinners and love them by His death? Jesus or Peter? I find it somewhat comical (and familiar) that Peter is telling Jesus “I will lay down MY life for you,” when Jesus is trying to explain that He is the one who will lay His life down. In verse 36, Jesus has just told him, “where I am going you cannot follow me now, but you will follow later.” I imagine Peter thinking something like, why can’t I follow now…I’ll prove to you I’m ready…I’ll even die for you Jesus! In His kindness, Jesus simply replies (V38), “Truly I tell you, a rooster will not crow until you have denied me three times.” 

Wow, what a shift in the room that brought. I wonder if Peter believed what Jesus said or if he thought it was just another symbolic parable. What could possibly waterdown his determined zeal? When Peter was confronted by the locals about his connection to Jesus, he did in fact deny Him. Like many of us, I think Jesus needed Peter to know that His love for him was a gracious love. A love that poured out to Peter, not because he was willing to lay down his life, but because he denied Jesus. 

Grace isn’t about proving myself. It’s about surrender to rescue. It isn’t about what I can do for Him. It’s about receiving what He is doing for me. It’s about resting in the unearned love of Christ for every single moment of my life, for now and eternity. His grace in the moments that I forget about grace. Moments when I claim my independence. Moments when I fall to temptation and deny knowing Him. Moments when I keep pulling up my boot straps in utter desperation. Moments when I think He needs a hand.  

The further I go on this journey with Jesus the more dependent on grace I become. I realize my weakness is irresistible to Him. I rest in His pursuit of my heart, with all its darkness and brokenness. I join Peter in John 21:17 saying, “Lord, you know that I love you.” I receive the words of Christ and agree with Paul in 2 Corinthians 12:9, “But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is perfected in weakness.” Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may reside in me.” 

When it comes to grace, salvation is just the first taste of an everlasting spring to be enjoyed.