Dinners with Sinners

Dec 26 2023 - Eric Buresh

I’m thinking this title probably won’t make it past our savvy communications team at Grace for the next fellowship initiative =). But I do think it’s the type of title Jesus would appreciate. I was recently flipping through a journal from last year and I came across some notes on a story in Mark 2, versus 13-17. In this passage, Jesus called Matthew (aka Levi), a dishonest tax collector, to be His disciple. Matthew followed. In the next scene, we find Jesus at dinner in Matthew’s house together with “many tax collectors and sinners.” The self-righteous (called Pharisees in Jesus’ time or religious in our time) were of course bothered by Jesus eating dinner with sinners and questioned why. Jesus responds, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I did not come to call the righteous, but sinners, to repentance.” 

I am so thankful that Jesus eats dinners with sinners. He did this so often in His earthly ministry that He was called the “friend of sinners.” Luke 7:34. This practice didn’t stop when Jesus ascended into heaven, it just took on a different form – the Holy Spirit showing up and calling us to eat the Bread of Life and drink the Living Water. In my life, Jesus, by His Spirit, came and ate dinner with me the first time when I was a young man. At that point, I was totally lost and consumed by selfishness, pride, and aggressive self-sufficiency. I was harsh to others, domineering, and let my bad temper fly whenever I felt like it. I liked doing things my way, and I had my own happiness under control. Jesus and I talked at dinner that night, and I acknowledged that, while I liked the path I was on for the most part, I was scared of where it was leading and I was definitely scared to meet my Maker. I made a deal with Jesus. His salvation in exchange for my mostly trying to follow the rules. That was the picture of my life for a while. Looked good (or at least better) on the outside, but it wasn’t awesome on the inside. 

I didn’t eat dinner with Jesus again for a decade or more. Kids came, work took off, responsibilities ballooned, traveling all the time, stress exploded. For several years, I could feel myself slowly breaking under the weight. I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t let it show. I had been a fighter my whole life. I could gut through this. I could take the pain. My wife and family needed me to hold it together. So, I held on with all my stubbornness and pride. I didn’t enjoy going to church. I felt it was pretty much a waste of time that I didn’t have, and just another responsibility. But I had made a deal so I kept up my end of it. A deal is a deal after all. While there were some bright spots with my family, life was mostly joyless in these years, but I believed that was the basic human experience. Not surprisingly, living like this, I eventually reached a breaking point. I came to the point of sheer exhaustion where every ounce of me wanted to give up, act out, and/or thrash about like a frustrated little child.   

Then, one night, amid my breaking, Jesus came and invited me to dinner again. Another dinner with a sinner. It’s hard to explain this dinner with words on a page. I’ll just say that this time, I wasn’t making any deals. I wasn’t negotiating from a position of strength. I was empty and I knew it. Jesus is so kind and gentle. He flooded my mind with reminders of who He is, and who I really am. He poured recollections of His Word into me that told me how much He loved me, and He invited me to love Him and to trust Him and to depend on Him for everything. To cast my cares on Him because He cared for me. And I did. And I do. I’ve never stopped from that dinner forward, and Jesus helps me get better at loving Him and depending on Him every day. Jesus and I eat dinner together all the time now. Multiple times a day on most days. It’s amazing every time. The very best of life-giving foods. Praise the Lord that Jesus eats dinners with sinners!